200 DAYS OF SOBRIETY AND CELIBACY
Yesterday marked 200 days of sobriety and celibacy.
I don’t know why that number is special to me, but I thought about all that I have done this far in my journey and am proud of how long I have come.
After coming face to face with death, I knew something had to change. The first to go is my relationships with substances and women.
Last year, during my divorce, I didn’t really date. Sure, there were a few women that I liked a fair bit, but in the end, I was too deep in my own shit to keep it together. Rather than own up to that, I went on a drinking binge that led to many poor choices I am not proud of today.
During my journey, and months right up until my divorce was finalized, I realized I became addicted to alcohol and women to make myself feel good. My choice to stop all of that was a realization when I woke up one morning not knowing the woman next to me in a hungover daze.
My choice to get sober and not have sex would challenge everything I had ever been taught as a man.
As men, we have been taught that running from your pain in the form of drinking and fucking will allow you to heal. But in the end, it forced me to come face to face with death.
In my thirty-five years of life, I have always been every stereotype you can think of when it comes to men. From Mr. Nice Guy to arrogant asshole and everything between. After divorce, I am finally free to be who I want to be.
My journey, although very rewarding is not an easy path. Every day I wake up, I am faced with the resistance of life. Pussy is free these days. Alcohol is everywhere. That is life, but this time I consciously make the choice of how I want to live.
Today I meditate for 15-30 minutes.
Today I practice gratitude with a sincere appreciation for the gift of life.
Today I train hard because it’s my god-given right as a man.
Today I authentically engage with the world.
Today I give fewer fucks about what others think about me.
Today I am 200 days sober.
Today I have made the choice not to have meaningless sex.
Today I have made a conscious effort to fight hurt. And through all of this, I have never felt more connected to myself, my career, and the people around me.
– George